With Christmas just around the corner and holiday movies filling up our televisions I thought I would give you guys a little quiz. See if you can guess what holiday movie the quote is from. Now don't cheat! The answers will be the first comment.
"It wouldn't be the Christmas season if the stores were anymore hooter...I mean hotter than they are."
-What did she says the play is called?
-That's no name. That's what it is.
-I know a name. I'd call it "Revenge at Bethlehem."
-[narrating] NOW it was serious. A double-dog-dare. What else was there but a "triple dare ya"? And then, the coup de grace of all dares, the sinister triple-dog-dare.
-I TRIPLE-dog-dare ya!
- [narrating] Schwartz created a slight breach of etiquette by skipping the triple dare and going right for the throat!
"It's just like Santa's workshop! Except it smells like mushrooms... and everyone looks like they wanna hurt me... "
-Did Clarissa leave her mittens here ?
-Oh, yes, yes they're right here.
-You hung them on the christmas tree ?
-Well, you remind me of everything good about Christmas so I just couldn't think of a better place. Here... there you are.
Yes! So perhaps, in the future, you will hold your tongue until you have discovered where the surplus population is, and WHO it is. It may well be that, in the sight of Heaven, you are more worthless and less fit to live than MILLIONS like this poor man's child.
Dear Santa Claus,
How have you been? Did you have a nice summer?
How is your wife? I have been extra good this year, so I have a long list of presents that I want.
Please note the size and color of each item, and send as many as possible. If it seems too complicated, make it easy on yourself: just send money. How about tens and twenties?
[Props man tries to attach antlers to a mouse]
-I can't get the antlers glued to this little guy. We tried Crazy Glue, but it don't work.
-Did you try staples?
Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?
Damn. How can you give Kris Kringle a parking ticket on Christmas Eve? What's next, rabies shots for the Easter Bunny?
-Fluctuate? You make it sound like I'm retaining water. I've gained 45 pounds in a week. Pete, -what's happening to me?
-Well, what's your diet like?
-Milk and cookies.
-But I don't finish all the milk.
-Well then there is your problem. Just try to cut back on the sweets, okay?
-That's not *my* Christmas! *My* Christmas is filled with laughter, and joy... and this: my Sandy Claws outfit. I want you to make it.
-Jack, please listen to me. It's going to be a disaster!
-How could it be? Just follow the pattern!
[holds up design of outfit]
-This part's red, the trim is white...
-It's a mistake, Jack!
-Now don't be modest. Who else is clever enough to make my Sandy Claws outfit?
On Christmas Eve many years ago I laid quietly in my bed. I did not rustle the sheets, I breathed slowly and silently. I was listening for a sound I was afraid I'd never hear: the sound of Santa's sleigh bells.
-All right, you're a reindeer. Here's your motivation: Your name is Rudolph, you're a freak with a red nose, and no one likes you. Then, one day, Santa picks you and you save Christmas. No, forget that part. We'll improvise... just keep it kind of loosey-goosey. You HATE Christmas! You're gonna steal it. Saving Christmas is a lousy ending, way too commercial. ACTION!
-[Max knocks the red nose off]
-BRILLIANT! You reject your own nose because it represents the glitter of commercialism. Why didn't I think of that? Cut, print, check the gate, moving on.
But wouldn't it be great if number one this Christmas wasn't some smug teenager but an old ex-heroin addict searching for a comeback at any price?