I am sitting at home last night watching a couple different reality shows, (america's most smartest model and the amazing race) where challenges involving animals were played, and all I kept thinking about was how smelly, disgusting, and annoying these animals were. It hit me with 100% certainity. I am not an animal lover. I have no desire to calmly caress a camel's nipple in order to extract a bowl full of milk,
nor do I have a need to play nice with a chicken
or worse yet...an ostrich.
I love Ellen Degeneres, but after hearing all the drama about the adopted dog, all I wanted to say was "it's a FREAKIN' DOG...get over it".
Through the years, our family has owned a couple dogs and some cats, and I have enjoyed (for the most part) these animals. But could I take them or leave them....yes. I don't get attached to animals. In my head they are a lesser species, one that darts stupidly in front cars, eats their own poo, and makes obnoxious noises into the night air for no apparent reason. I love zoos, because the animals are in seclusion and I don't have to interact with them. Instead I can just stare at them through a glass window like a scientist watching a lab rat. I'm not saying that animals are not amazing creatures that are wondrous to watch, but I like my animals at a distance. I don't let the dogs kiss me on the mouth or eat off my silverware, and forget about letting them on my lap if they aren't smelling good. No...animals have a long way to go before I consider them "one of my own".
8 comments:
AMEN. I agree with you 100%.
petting zoos = suckiness. I hope animals never rule the world because I would be allergic to it.
It's a pet free zone at this house (unless you count kids).
I have mixed feelings on pets. I love our dog, but would I be devastated if we no longer had him? No. I'm glad Elsie will be around him so she isn't afraid of dogs. But I can honestly say, I'm really not an animal person either. They kind of gross me out!
This is hillarious. I never grew up with pets, so was surprised at how much I fell in love with our totally hyper and obnoxious dog and two most whiny cats on the planet. However, I can totally respect your points. I wouldn't wish the annoying-ness of our pets on my worst enemy!
You know I HATE animals.
YES!! I agree! They also lick their own butts! It's easier for me to stay away because I'm allergic to everything but rocks and fish! Fish are gross and smelly too.....
You know I think that the only reason that god made them is for man to eat them. I love me a good Animal in my scope....or human it depends on how stupid they are acting. You are right to judge those nasty little S*&t.
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